I think there must be some kind public transport Feng Shui that I am unaware of but the rules seem to go thus:
Stand as close to the door as possible regardless of how much space is on the bus. The best Chi is right by the door, besides you might want to get off quickly.
Do not move down the aisle, stand rigidly in that spot, do not move until it is time to get off.
Those tutting noises and low growling sounds you hear are just other passengers trying to board a half empty bus.
Sit only in the aisle seat the chi flows better along the aisle, don’t sit by the window, you might need to get off quickly.
If the window seat is free do not move to let someone sit. if they want to sit so badly make them climb over your legs, only move your legs to one side if you are afraid of having your toes stepped on.
Put your bags on the empty seat next to you, your lap needs to be free for air to circulate and your bags need to be comfortable too. Ignore the woman with heavy bags/small child in her arm/ man with broken leg. Pretend you don’t see them, even when they tap your shoulder, don’t let them disturb your bus meditation time.
When boarding a train, prepare yourself, stand in readiness for the doors to open. As soon as they open the slightest crack race on, never mind the passengers trying to get off, shove them back on if necessary, it’s imperative that you acquire that seat!
If you follow these simple steps, you will arrive at your destination, that is all. Enjoy your journey at the expense of other travellers.
Lemons and Spuds 